So you have a goal in mind, it might seem quite out of reach right now. And that’s okay. Mine are so far out of reach just at the minute that I can barely see them let alone touch their tails!
First thing to do is make a plan, I am planning of having a jumping lesson tonight, one step nearer my goal of getting back out eventing. I am entering Norton Disney BE80 TODAY… in fact, I’m going to do it RIGHT NOW…
Stop bloody procrastinating and get on with it!!! I’ve entered the 80cms because I’m simply not ashamed of going down a level to get confidence. I couldn’t give 2 sh*ts what people say about me when it comes to the height I’m jumping, its not about height – it’s about survival.
So there we are, no backing out. My season begins at Norton Disney on Saturday 7th April 2018, two days after my 32nd birthday! You’d think at 32 I would be much more in control, I am not, less so in fact!!
So, here’s how I make a plan; I count back in weeks from the goal date, mine is 5… in those 5 weeks I need to do a series of things to ensure non-death on the day. I have to get him out in public at least 3 times, I need to jump a cross country jump or two and I need to get hacking a bit more. ~I also need to make sure I have lost that stone and upped my own fitness levels a bit too.
I need to look at photos of us out there doing it last year to make me feel less nervous… this absolutely does help 100%
Sometimes things are easier said than done though and the thought of even driving to the yard is now broken up by toilet trips and a furrowed brow, all because the target is in place.
I can’t think too far ahead though, I have to focus on a small goal like getting through today’s jumping lesson, then the next one of hacking and then the cross country jumps and then that first event and I will on my way to feeling confident again.
It’s easy to sit and say, ‘just get on with it’ but unless you have felt fear, life stopping, heart pounding, palm sweating fear, you simply cannot understand how much focus is needed to get to where you want to be. You can’t make sense of why someone wouldn’t just go and ‘learn’ from the day and have no expectations. I am now at the point where I am scared of what fear might do to me.
It’s happened a few times now and I’m told it is a normal reaction but, I have this feeling of being sat on by an overweight walrus right across my chest, I feel like I can’t breathe and that frightens me almost as much as the fear. I need to get that under control because fainting in the warm-up means you are unlikely to be allowed to continue the event!!
So, very simply;
- Make a plan
- Control the fear (you’ll never get rid of him!)
- Skip along in baby steps
- Don’t worry what other people think
Most importantly of all, BE BRAVER THAN YOU THINK YOU ARE!
Love as always
Vic and Pat